>>84637505I just wanna jump to the date already so I can rip the band-aid off but the days feel longer now than before it was announced.
>>84637581I have a clip of her coming back from a pee break on one of the Quarry streams of her saying she missed seeing the little ritual we did in chat for her leaving and coming back. That kinda helped me cope thinkng she wanted to stream again but couldnt but here we are. I wonder what changed her mind or if she was just saving face when she already decided to go>>84637740Not even an idea of why shes done all this and shes strangely positive about all of this when before she had almost no signs of this outcome and hinted at her coming back multiple times. Everything is speculation at this point, she barely said anything in members streams that she didnt already say in public so I can only assume she hates her new fanbase since thats all thats left, the rats. Dramafags, people who never watched her, and maybe people who dropped her when she went corpo could easily say money but Kunai from day one made it clear she didnt want to get people spending money on her for any reason. She held off opening her memebrships for as long as possible, talked about how she doenst like vps and merch because she couldnt see herselfspeding money when fans or she could just make it, even saying how she watched other people in Niji for years when she was mostly a lurker and didnt want to see value of a fan from how much money they gave her or their badge. When she got a bunch of streamlabs (since when people asked her why she didnt care about memberships being open yet she said that youtube takes a month and streamlabs are instant so she doenst need to open them if anyone wanted to donate) she still felt uncomfertable taking peoples money and hammered home the "Buy yourself something nice instead" speech anytime she got even 20 dollars. I WISH she just wanted more money and was bitter about not being popular like everyone who doest care thinks since its such an easy cop out but since shes probably going back to her old account to stream lol or something I'm just gonna guess she was waiting out her time untill she decided to just quit cold turkey without facing anyone becuase she only knew us for a few months vs her old fans who have years on their belt I assume. My only conclusion can be right now that Rats dont matter to her and I would love to have something in the next few weeks change my mind but I doubt it at this point since she doesnt seem affected at all by what shes doing. I'm too new, she hates me
>>84637836thank
>>84637841I do feel better coming here and saying something instead of ignoring it. I wish my emotions didnt swing from happy to sad to angry but I've been cursed with more than enough time to think about all this.
