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Ive basically given up on everything. Ill probably never own my own home, which means ill be living paycheck to paycheck if I wanted to move into an overpriced apartment or rental property for the rest of my life. Or I can keep living with my racsit boomer parents for the rest of my life and listen to them yell at the tv and ask when im going to "get out there and live my life". Thats of course, when theyre not fighting with the other half of my family that is uber liberal and mocks them for being ignorant and not progressive like them. Theres only few of us in my family that arent on either side of the extreme but we dont talk anymore since we're all so busy.
I dont think im ever going to get into my dream careers either, which is pissing me off since I was pushed to go to college and pout myself in debt, but nobody cares about having a degree. I just had to quit my last job when they lied about what I was going to be doing so im back at my old job again.
I'm growing increasingly apathetic about everything. I had a basic plan for life. Go to school, get a job, work hard and climb the ladder to live a comfortable life. I swore off on dating until I was comfortably happy with myself so I can support another person, but now I have no experience in dating and no stability in my life to try. Im terrified of getting trapped and having a kid and then im stuck at low paying job in my shitty hometown forever. Everything sucks and ive gone from miserable to numb in just a few years with no end in sight. I just want to get away from it all