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I'm 37, and I live alone. I have a career in medical retail, and I enjoy it. Aside from my usual hobbies, I like to write. I'm over halfway through a fantasy novel that has taken me years to write because I'm ridiculously bad at motivating myself or setting routines.
Nothing is "bad" about my life. I've had a supportive family, truly wonderful and forgiving friends, and I'm good at dealing with people. But I've never found anyone I've fallen in love with. When you're young, you think love is found in every flirtatious wink, or every unspoken moment, or stolen kiss. It's only when you've grown more and moved on from those fleeting moments that you realise just how shallow the experience was. At my age, having had no solid relationships for over a decade, I'm starting to question if I even have the capacity to love. And secretly, I'm terrified of getting into an empty relationship just because I'm lonely. Love grows with time, I'm told, but even though I'm still relatively young, I feel as though I don't have the time to waste on hollow endeavours.
There have been so many chances I haven't taken. Even when you're still capable of changing yourself, you still deeply regret the things you haven't done.
