Quoted By:
>be me
>live in London
>go to the shop to buy a red bull
>get shot in the arm by a roadman on my way there
>but how did he get a gun? I thought guns were banned here
>didn't get me that bad, walk up to him and stab him with my keys
>get to the shop
>turns out I'm only 15 and it's illegal for me to buy drinks with sugar in them
>on my way back get arrested by the police
>turns out I'm not legally allowed to defend myself
>go to jail for 2 years
>get an extra 2 years for not having a TV license
>mfw the guy that shot me didn't get arrested because he wore a face mask
>mfw at least I'm not american
>mfw at least i can have an opaque backpack
God save the queen
