OP here. Going to abandon thread, I'll try to work things out with her. Thanks for all of the advice, whether they were helpful or trolling posts or some other type of post...
I'll take most posts on here into consideration and make my decision. I may or may not create a part 2 thread tomorrow.
Honorary mentions goes to the most helpful anon:
>>1107298>>1107709>>1107912Thanks based leaf. If I ever see you cornered by 10+ rakes and leaf blowers, I'd be willing to tell them to fuck off before they get tipped.
