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tsutsu kun, i think i will gib fixing my constant dissociation a try. it should not take much time to fix but the difficulty is heckin nightmarish. i think le dissociation my most severe issue. also my brain kind of uses an advanced technique to dissociation maxx. when one hears different sources of sound one can focus only on 1 and the other sources become background noise. my brain creates noise (by having lots of repeating thoughts) and on focuses on it, turning le irl into background noise. its something i have to fix too to fix le dissociation but doing it heckin hurts mentally (idk how else i could describe it). its all about le neuro plasticity...