When I saw what came next, I couldn't take it; my palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms of spaghetti.
Unlike normal Touhou vidya, this one just started with a blank screen for 5 seconds, before "" appeared all over the screen for a split second. Then came Cirno's blood-curdling laugh, followed by an image of Ben Garrison and simply the text "Game Start".
When I started the game, all of a sudden a song started playing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQubSHB9DBU, it spooked me real bad, I nearly had an heart attack. The game suddenly started on Lunatic Ultra Hyper Insane mode with over 9000 cancerous danmaku raining from the heavens as Remilla proclaimed "BOW DOWN TO YOUR TRUE GOD"... I felt a shiver down my spine.
I began involuntarily kneeling very slowly to the ground without giving it thought, I was mentally paralyzed - the spooky image of a magical loli vampire's face had been implanted into my retina. My eyes started to bleed green, then purple, then rainbow, then invisible and then x-ray coloured.
As I was getting very triggered I realized that I could use this situation to my advantage, my hotpocket-loaded fedora sponsored by ABIB was on the ground. My vision slowly drifted to the fedora as I heard a distant cry "no, not my weakness".
Snapping out of it, I quickly whipped out my fedora, and tipped it as the now amorphous hotpockets spewed out of it and engulfed my swank new monitor, I would have to get a new one, but that wasn't the issue at hand.
