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ITT we talk about the weirdest time we had sex
>inb4
>I'm XX years old and am still a virgin
R9K
>be me
>23
>one of my balls is the size of a grapefruit
>not cancer but it's full of fluid
>make a surgery appointment for later in the week
>in the meantime
>went to a party my friend was hosting
>the people at the party were a couple of friends and a chick the host met on tinder plus a couple of her friends
>having good time play beer pong
>the host/his date versus me/the dates friend
>we'll my partner S
>we win
>start talking afterwards and get her number
>have zero intention on calling her
>couple of days pass and I went to my surgery i scheduled earlier
>ball is smaller but fucking hurts
>he says I will bleed out of my nutsack until it heals completely, so make sure to change the bandages
>doc says to not drink and have sex
>not based
>hands me pain killers
>super based
>time passes
>the host of the party never scored with tinder chick
>he ask me if he could have Ss number
>surehere.jpeg
>S says no to host because he dumped Ss friend
>lied his ass off and said it more of hanging out since there will be a group of people there
>she agrees
>he managed to get me and 3 other guys to 'hang out' at the bar
>everyone is there an we starts drinking
>everyone is having a good time
>keep in mind I still have that gash in my nuts and alcohol thins your blood
>couple hours passed
>bar is boring but everyone still wants to hangout at another bar
>i have to drain the lizard before we leave
>stand up and see some blood in my chair
>shit.png
>calmly walk into the bathroom
>definitely leaked through the pants near the crotch
>looks like I'm bleeding out of my ass
>welp, nothing I can do about it now
>go back to table and they laugh at me
>I laugh too and say I'm on my period and have to stop at my place to change
>go home and notice that my gauze is completely soaked in blood
>change it as well as my pants
>but some super glue on my cut just in case