>>19193149other people sharing in your misery is not "enlightenment." there is a cognitive delusion that you can fix right there. obviously you are aware of this because you used those quotes.
you seem deeply introspective.
you clearly understand that this is wrong for you, and want to stop. we understand you're just here for that little extra encouragement, that little extra push. you can end this behavior, or at least majorly cut back.
love you anon.