>>15401988It starts out feeling like Pascal's Wager, but it gets deeper as time goes on. Is/isn't, does/doesn't, the questions matter less. As objective reality becomes more tenuous, your lived reality will become more dear and more real. I pray sometimes because I love my friends, one who I talk to all the time, one who I don't but dearly wish I did. I pray for strength because I have so many solid reasons to kill myself, and perhaps they'd be sad if I did, and I should try to make something of the years I have left. It's not about is God listening or isn't God there or was it answered or wasn't it. It's better that I pray than don't pray, which reifies the idea of better. It reifies love, and with better already reified, it is better to love than not love. Perhaps it's a flimsy little scaffold but it's held up through some pretty awful times and it means something to me. So I keep praying. I don't need a reason anymore.
