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>Chris compares his own nonexistent relationships with trolls posing as women to his mother's real but dysfunctional relationships prior to meeting Bob.
>Chris claims that Barb dated Tom Ashby in high school and that her sisters falsely accused her of being a slut, causing lasting enmity between them.
>Chris denies that Barb ever had sex in high school, even though he previously claimed that she did.[2]
>Barb only married Bob because he owned a house, although there was "some genuine Love" in their relationship.
>Barb allegedly offered herself for sex after learning about Chris losing his virginity to Mia Hamm.
>Chris still believes that he's Jesus Christ.
>Chris claims that Jacob Sockness cursed the country with the COVID-19 pandemic.
>Chris describes World War III breaking out as a result of My Little Pony G5 not being canceled.
>Chris warns Kenneth that now is not the time to be making a wiki page about any lolcow who does not already have one.
