>Online Racism Makes IRL Dating Hell for Gay Asian Men"I'm not racist. I just have preferences." On dating and hook-up apps for gay men, this seems to be a common justification from guys who state phrases like "No Asians" in their bios or while chatting. Now I totally get that these apps are primarily for sex and people have preferences, and blah, blah, blah, but really: How these things are said with such casualness shows the insidious powers of language.
Being so upfront and flip in denying conversation with an entire race is, let's face it, pretty racist. And this isn't just Grindr; online dating sites offer pretty much the same dynamic toward gay Asian men. It's gross how someone could be so upfront about a dislike for a race: "Sorry. You're cute, but no Asians for me." (Sorry, but apologetic openings don't redeem you as a good human being.) Short and to the point with why I wasn't wanted, I started feeling like the majority of guys didn't have any interest in me because I am Asian. Eventually, I became fed up and got off apps, and I continue to put little effort in online dating.
https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/mgy7wx/how-online-racism-towards-gay-asian-men-effects-irl-dating 