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Is it possible to have an illness involving a strong aversion to fantasy? The inability to accept that fictional ideas are okay to cultivate, and okay to share? I find myself tearing my hair out trying to squeeze out any amount of work that isn't grounded in observation. It destroys things I create because I can't complete them with something that I can't accept as unrealistic or insane. I have to be really out of my head to share any of my work and bear to look at what others think. Even on drugs, I find myself hanging in this brutal thought process.
