>>529802>>530432>>530589>>530737In summation you sound like you have a very low self esteem, very unmotivated and have been generally beaten down in life. I can already tell you were picked on in HS and that's okay. Right now you feel like the world is against you and that you're fighting all alone. Well you are. Because you've chosen this life. You made the choice to live this way. At any moment you can go outside, talk to anyone you want and make a new friend. You are just too afraid to go do it which is normal. We're all afraid of something anon and I can tell yours is failure. You don't like to fail. You consider failure a true well failure and that's normal. The abnormal thing is that you don't seem to want to change it.
You may be all alone in this world and nobody cares about you but that's just the thing. Nobody cares what you do meaning you can do whatever you want. Stop trying to live up to the expectations set by the world and everyone in it and start living for yourself.
Do what makes you truly happy and stop thinking that you have to conform to a certain way in order to have value. Because honestly you're the only person who can give your life value.
Please anon. I say this as a friend don't end your life. It doesn't get easier but it gets more comfortable. You learn to cope and fill your life with things that make you happy. It won't be immediate and it won't happen overnight but it will happen.
You just have to take the first step to make it happen.
