>>19984797Fear of pain, screwing it up and ending up a vegetable, and the unknown.
I'm a coward because continuing to live this life is no better than being a vegetable, and pain and death are inevitable anyways.
I just can't do it, in spite of this knowledge. I don't know why. There's nothing for me to live for, and things will only get worse every year in spite of my efforts to push onward.
My best friends both killed themselves in the same year. There's no reason I shouldn't be able to do the same. There's nothing but suffering, adversity and humiliation in store for me.
Yet I still can't do it.
I'm just a coward.
