Quoted By:
>be me.
>be dad who takes care of shitty family.
>wife who only wanted sex and nothing else.
>son who is a fat shit and sits on his computer all day.
>daughter who watches My Little Pony while the rest of the family begs to turn it off.
>has a big dumbass dog and a lazy cat
>i ask wife to take dog out to take a shit.
>she flips me off and starts playing with dildo.
>ask's son to take care of the dog.
>he gets off his computer and takes the dog outside with poop bag.
>dog runs around and sniffs to mark territory.
> dog decides to take shit in the yard.
>son is a little upset and picks up pile of shit
>he forgot to pick up one turd.
>I am watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 on Netflix while eating leftover Chinese food.
>son picks up turd with bare hands
>he has a nasty idea
>son encourages dog to eat poop
>like the deuce bag the dog is, he eats the turd.
>son and dog walks in the room
>son goes on his computer again playing counterstrike
>dog sounds like he's sick
>I notice
>tells wife to take the dog to the vet
>she acts like a little girl and goes to vet with dog
>she comes back
>"our fucking dog ate his shit like the stupid mutt he is. "
>son and I are laughing so hard
>daughter sees us laughing
>she asks me for remote
>" no. "
>she goes upstairs
>dog suddenly throws up his turd
>son and I look at each other
>wife is mad and tells me to pick it up
>I pick up the disgusting chunky shit that smells like corn and chicken and shit
>everything is back to normal
>son tells that he made him eat it
>I tell him good job
>both of us are happy
