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you still think about her dont you? does it hurt? does it keep you up at night knowing it's your fault?
do you feel the weight of your sins? does it hurt? does God's judgement fill you with guilt? torment?
or do you feel rage? do you curse his name for striking you down?
you can never fix what you've done
you will carry that weight into death
woe upon you who deny him, for he will deny you in the world to come