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This one time I knew this girl who had the silkiest hair. This is not a meme or copypasta. This is real. This one time I was sitting behind her in biology class and I just couldn’t stop staring at her hair. I looked around the classroom to check if anyone was watching but they were not looking at me. So I made my move. Gently and carefully I began to lean forward and managed to give her hair a quick sniff. Before I was able to reach my hand out to examine its texture, I heard a super loud cough. It was coming from behind me so I twisted around expecting to be caught out. The cough had come from this girl sitting behind me who I’d actually spoken to a few times. I guess she sort of felt sorry for me because she’d sometimes smile at me or pretend to laugh at my jokes. Even this one time she caught me browsing /pol/ in History and asked me what it was. I told her it was this this forum where we decided the fate of metageopolitics. She told me that was super cool. Anyway, I basically considered her a friend. But this time she gave me a frown and asked me in a disturbed tone what I was doing. I tried to cover it up by saying that I was reaching down to grab my pencil sharpener but she said in a really loud voice “No you weren’t. You were trying to sniff Lucy’s hair you creep!” At that moment the whole class turned around and started at me. I didn’t know what to do. I was terrified. But this girl Lucy turned around to me and actually have me a smile. “That’s kinda cute” she said and giggled. After class we started talking and I asked her out to the cinema that evening. Anyway long story short she’s now my girlfriend and I’m basically a chad now. The moral of this story is that there’s no excuse for not having a girlfriend if I can get one. WIMPS! YOU ARE THE PROBLEM! Take a good hard look at your life and fix it and start finding the joy in life not the pathetic bitterness that manifests in your internet activity.
