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I know it hurts them. I know that it's not something that they can fix and that conversion therapy is bad.
I know that being trans is most strongly associated with growing up in a household that is either too encouraging of being gender non-conforming, or too strict about gender and sexual exploration. Either one is bad.
The real reason I'm bothered by trans stuff, then, is because so many people come out as trans despite the fact it seems they're barely trying. It seems more like a type of autism than an actual female-male thing.
You are asking me to lie to myself and the world. You are asking me to see someone acting like a typical male and then say "you must call this a woman".
I am autistic.
As an autist, I value objective reasoning above emotional reasoning. I don't have bad intentions, I just really value honesty, because I lack the social imprint that says "hey, you should lie, it makes people feel better when you lie"
I can suppress it, and so I do not offend these people, but it leads to me distancing myself from them because it's just so hard to communicate when I'm actively forced to lie just to have a normal conversation.
Not only that, but in my dialect, you can use terms like "he" to refer to a woman. They do not take offence to this. However, trans people will be gravely offended. Once again, my already hampered social ability is abused and tested and I instead choose to distance from these people.
I'm doing my best but this is unfair on autistic people.
