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My mother was a whore, i never knew my father. I was raped by my gay cousin. my grandfather tried to kill my brother by throwing him out of a two story window. Then he died of cancer. I'v been in dozen of jumpings and countless fights, many of which resulted in my ass getting handed to me. I got listed as potential school threat due to the harmless drawings back in 7th grade resulting in expulsion and rumors involving a second columbine, and everyone involved trying their hardest to get me to do it by relentlessly bullying me and following me for the rest of middle school. After being diagnosed with ADD right after and prescribed a stimulant, i developed hyper anxiety disorder and lived in a constant state of paranoia where anything caused a minor panic attack, and the feeling that nowhere was safe. i was Unable to sleep most nights because my heartbeat rarely slowed enough for me to relax for almost 3 years.I had to wait until I was literally too tired to fight sleep. Closing my eyes was terrifying. This usually resulted in me staying up until I got to school the next morning to pass out in all my classes. Which in turn made me look super depresses to everyone including the bullies, As they at the time beleived i was just one push away from a school massacre they could say they lived through. a shitty cycle. I could go on and on about how my life used to be shit. But it's all that shit that gave me priorities in life. You really only have two options if your life turns out to suck dick. And thats bitch about it and never change. Or suck it the fuck up and take your own pain away. Even if it's just seeking other people. By the time i hit 10th grade i turned all that shit around. Because i hit the lowest low and saw no one else gave a shit about me but me. And once you understand that life gets easier. Just keep living. Life might get even more shitty. But keep living anyway. cuz It can only get better if you manke it better. you fucking faggots.
