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>play football
>goalkeeper
>there's a big cunt in the opposite team
>he screeches "I'M GONNA SCREEN THE GOALIE!"
>no you fucking won't
>as soon as he gets to me i pull down his shorts
>kick him in the back of his leg
>he flips
>scream profanities at him
>get sent off
>my team lost 4-0 after i left but it was damn satisfying