>>17988477we were going out to spend some time outside because it's sunny and her one day off. she parked at our apartment infront of a no parking sign, while i was in the passenger seat, and we both went upstairs to do stuff to come back down to go out quickly. we go back downstairs, and there is a crowd of angry people trying to get out of the parking lot. they yell at both of us, and this overwhelms me because i have a sensitive nervous system. even though my mom is backing up, they are still angry. i just don't bother, and go upstairs feeling like a sack of shit, trying my best to regather my emotions, and my mom calls me to come back down an hour later to pick up the groceries. i do, but i am dragging my feet, head down in shame, heart sunken to my stomach. she just ignores this and keeps going. her one recognition was, "why are you being so slow" then ignores me the rest of the time. i end up hiding in my closet, just to stop all the fucking stimulation, and try my best to decompress. i am laying on my bed, but everything still just feels like too much right now.
i don't really have a friend to talk to because my only one hasn't been emotionally available lately, and i would touch grass, but i just can't do more stimulation right now. i keep hitting my head into walls, like i don't expect to get hurt. i'm a fucking idiot.
