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Because I'm a socially inept retard. I can't even approach or touch a guy without acting like a sperg. Every time I have to communicate with a male, I become super awkward and embarrassed for no reason. I start saying stupid shit that doesn't even make sense. And if a guy has interest in me or wants to be my friend irl, which is very rare, I just push them away for no reason because I'm too shy to engage in any type of intimacy. I also do a lot of things that are considered 'masculine' or 'gross' for a female to do.
Why did you program me like this god. Why.
