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I'm fucking done, bant. I don't even know if killing myself is worth it. I poured everything into my maths and no one cares. I don't know what else. I already failed at so many things, and not of my own doing. I have the best plans, and then other people use my plans and make money later, and I am beyond death right now. I don't understand the world and don't know what to do.
I'll press on. That is the only option. But I look out and everything looks black, and there is no hope, and society at large is killing everything I think is beautiful.