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>going to a movie with my wife, her bf and his son
>they let me see Ready Player One because I worked 100 hours of overtime this month
>drive there in my 4 cylinder crossover, gas efficient and safe for my family
>buy everyone treats, comes to $200, only have enough money left for a onions latte for myself
>sit in the theater, booked the best seats in the house
>a group of black men in traditional African garb come in, banging on drums
>"oops wrong showing my niggas, we're going to see black Panther for the fifth time"
>tip them my last $20 from my allowance for their show regardless
>wife adds a sticker to my "good husband" chart, 10 more and I get a handjob
>trailers come on
>STAR WARS SOLO
>squeal I'm so excited and pretend I'm holding a lightsaber
>my wife's son joins in and tells me Finn is a more powerful jedi than Luke, I agree with him
>getting kind of boring, pull out my nintendo switch and play a little Mario through the other trailers
>finally the movie starts, close my reddit tabs on my iphone x, browsing r/politics (so close to drumpf being impeached by Mueller)
>shaking in my seat, have been waiting for Ready Player One for months now
>a black guy walks into the theater late
>I offer my seat to him but realize there are no other seats available
>walk way up to the front and sit on the ground in front of the first row
>as I sit, popcorn crunches beneath me, my pants become stuck to the floor, doused in soda
>it's okay though, imagine being a slave, he's had a much harder time than me
>crane my neck back and begin watching the movie
>mfw I get all of the references
