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>I'm here at the last remaining record store in Spaghetti Town in an effort to get inside the head of the WWA's most enigmatic "star", the vacuous valkyrie Ava Mortis
>Just what makes this noxious Norwegian tick?
>Perhaps her favourite album, Corpse Raper, from one of her favourite bands, Blood Rot, can provide us with some insight
>Sadly the proprietor of the store had never heard of Blood Rot, as I'm sure most people with even a modicum of taste haven't, but fortunately I was able to find a copy of the album in a piss covered dumpster (coincidently the name of Blood Rot's second studio album) just outside of Hobopolis
>Let's give it a listen!
>Hmm, how to describe the sound..
>Imagine two elderly alley cats being dropped into a meat grinder mid-coitus
>So that was a bit of a bust, but maybe we can get to know Ava through her favourite foods! After all, you are what you eat!
>I have here a piping hot plate of Norway's national dish, fårikål
>*sniff* Well.. It has a very distinct aroma...
>Ask a man dying of colon cancer to defaecate in a pot of boiling cabbage for you and you'll have a fairly good approximation of the smell
>And the taste?
>You know, let's not
>Truth be told, I don't want to get inside your head, Ava. Frankly I already know what's in there; several boxes of unsold inventory from Hot Topic and a lot of empty space
>I don't want to get in your pants either, I'm absolutely certain no one does
>But I DO want that thing that's keeping those pants up
>And come next show the Super Duper Multiversal Championship belt WILL BE MINE!
