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why do do I even do this shit?
it's not like i enjoy being drunk and i defiantly not addicted either
maybe it's just some viscous cycle because i rarely get the opportunity to buy alcohol and once i have it i feel obligated to use it
I'm honestly starting to think that i just us intoxication as an excuse to act like a jackass
I also re-watch anime i have already seen and I'm not sure if that's just because I'm to lazy to find new ones or if that a sign of some more concerning desire to be indefinitely stuck in the past
