>>972896Happy birthday anon. And I do feel alone too. I don't mean to sound pretentious but I always feel alone, no matter what I say or do I never feel that anyone really cares, I feel like I just exist to everyone. And I hate that feeling, it makes me question if I'm even real or if anyone's real. I've felt this way since 3rd grade as I didn't really have friends, we loved a lot, and my mom always worked (dad wasn't there).
I just woke up from a dream about my ex from 4years ago, I'm sure she moved on completely (she's been with a guy for 3 years) but I really miss her, mostly because I genuinely felt like we actually understood each other.
College is killing me as well, I don't want to do this anymore. I have NEVER had a vacation, we couldn't afford one as a kid and I just want to go somewhere. I have 1 more year left and ~$20k in debt so I can't afford to leave.
I've genuinely become a shadow of my former self. All I've gained is weight from college. All this coupled with feeling alone all the time gets to me. I don't even drink or smoke anymore because I don't want to lie to myself, I know it won't solve my problem. I just want peace of mind. I'd like a friend to not feel so lonely.
> 20 > Physics 