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>went out jogging at the park trying to destroy my self-destructive thoughts again (but failed miserably again)
>accidentally gulped out loud "im such a fucking fat pig piece of shit" and the two nerdy girls fast-walking near me heard it and looked at me and their facial expression instantly, inaudibly said "yup, you're absolutely a fucking fat pig piece of shit"
>at the same time im trying to grasp their expression they slowed down and leaned out and distanced from me as if I'm so disgusting they have to stop their fast-walking session instantly
>so defeated and humiliated from this I switched from jogging to full load sprinting to run away from this existential embarrassment and 1 min later my knees hurt because im really such a fucking fat pig piece of shit my knees can't carry my weight comfortably