>>20872456Honestly exactly the same situation here. I never knew how fucking adaptable I was when it counts until I started working with 15 at the apprenticeship. I got a rough group with a lot of confrontational Albanians and Italians who where all a year or two older than me but I managed fine. It was really tiring and I interacted with them as little as possible, but also never got under the bus and played their childish game of dominance. I'm glad I went through this, if I didn't and instead went studying I'd probably have killed myself from anxiety and other shit by now.
>>20872467I am doing exposure therapy every few weeks and go out, usually with my father (cringe yes). Honestly though if it had anything to do with getting used to it I'd have a much easier time talking and socializing by now. There's just 0 motivation to talk to someone with an unfiltered self, too awkward. On the other hand filtering and managing just takes so much energy that I'm dead after an hour..
It's kind of over for me
>>20872475Well I know that changing is impossible. I tried it many times before and it just keeps being an altered version of my behavior and is never internalized. I was more speaking about altering myself consistently whenever I am speaking to someone, like I am doing now, but less deflecting and more open. I doubt I could keep that up though without seeing serious results. I also don't really have a place to start, everyone knows me how I am (passive, quiet, responsible, quick when needed, not so much when not(lazy)). It'd be weird if I changed form one day to the other. IDK
