>>22542747oh i'm not suicidal. never have been. in the past when things were even worse for me though i did have a voice in my head telling me i should kill myself a lot, every day all the time actually, but things got better for me. i moved back in with my parents, started working out, read a little philosophy and the book of proverbs, found god and it really changed my outlook, and eventually the voice went away. i do however have some pretty serious heartache, not the worst i've ever dealt with, but it's definitely bad, the girl i'm hurting over is so special and unique, better than any of the other girls i've given affection to. glad your gaming is going well, i've given up on them myself but i know how much of a joy they can be, especially to people who are hurt or lonely, and i'll probably play again someday. i hope you can find a path to a better mindset, you have value, everyone does.
wanna give some words of comfort to my crush, who i think is feeling low right now. i think you were hoping the world would change pretty dramatically, i know you have a lot of issues with a lot of things, and in your heart you feel that things are really unjust and trending worse, and even more painful i think you see the crooked getting rewarded while the upright get left behind. i'm not gonna argue with you and say that isn't so. i've had disappointments and setbacks in my life too, felt like i should have been rewarded better for my hard work and had to watch people i thought lesser men than me get propelled much farther "ahead" than i was. but i think god had a plan for me, and does for everyone, but it takes time to see it play out. he's the longest term investor there is, and sometimes what you want is not at all what you need, sometimes what seems like a crown is really a curse, what seems like a burden really a blessing. you might not value my adoration for you, but it really is there. i hope it can comfort you now.
