>>12923447The Summa by Aquinas is three volumes alone. Start with him, then read the Faith of the Early Fathers.
Christ wasn’t that many generations ago. Geniuses existed, and they thought about your objections, and they answered them.
If you’re lazy as well as willfully ignorant, you can watch jew tube videos of Dr. William Lane Craig; he’s a protestant heretic, but he’s no moron, and he discusses the necessity of God’s existence in layman’s terms.
I hope you keep searching, anon.