>>11164645Please excuse my unsolicited interjection.
>Have I not shown love? Have I not made my love known?From my point of view, this is incomplete understanding.
The change comes when you release yourself from all fears, by handing your 'self' completely over to (what's been called here) the god of creation.
This immersion, when sincere, will be known to you when you are thankful for every breath, when you see adversity as having a lesson within it that you embrace to understand and learn from. When the simplest of things not only make you thankful for the joy it brings, but even the most difficult you receive as blessings.
When you realize you are connected in such a way, when you are 'there', fears are replaced with love. The 'personal relationship' you have actual fills you, as you see 'god' within yourself, not as something you 'strive to know'.
In the first religion class I ever had, as a 6 year-old in Catholic school, I was told:
Q: Who is God
A: God is All.
Q:What is God?
A: God is Love.
Then we were taught that We Are, by reason, a part of God, because, if he is everything, we are, also. Which also means: We Are Love.
None of it sounded esoteric to a six year-old mind. It made perfect sense.
To this day, it's the one lesson I will never forget. And, though there were many times in between that I forgot that trust and fautered, even in the darkest of times when abject desolation almost made me succumb...there came a point when, so bereft no more tears would flow, so lost of all hope I was left to silence.
>...the channel I had somehow detatched myself from once again, once again reopened. Left to finally listen: all the answers I so needed to hear would began flowing.
What was missing? Me. That part of Me I had abandoned, lost track of. Without that connection I was not whole.
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Please forgive my personal thoughts, but something tells me you need a clearer perspective, one that's not at all as mysterious or complex as you appear to think it is.
