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I fap because the alternative is that i would get a prostitute and probably catch something like HPV or something.
I've already thought about getting one and do some sexual techniques i would be into that carry no risk of transmission of stds.
Feet stuff, clothed facesitting, handjob, blowjob ect.
But i already feel bad enough for masturbating, getting a prostitute feels like an even bigger sin.
I literally can't stop, even when i stopped watching porn i feel the need to do it.
It never made sense to me how God gave men these urges and then put me in the world where the only way to satisfy them is not possible for me, through marriage and procreation.
I'm a 21 year old Neet, i'm fixing my life right now by getting a job, but it will be years before i can even consider marriage.
I do not have the strenght and self discipline for this and i have tried to get it through prayer.
It's just not working.
