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The year is 2030. I’m a secret agent with the FBI sent to Kentucky to investigate a potential terrorist cell. One night as I walk out of the local Golden Corral after enjoying a delicious dinner of Bourbon Chicken and cheesecake, I feel a tug at my duster. “Excuse me sir, I’ll suck your cock for a ciggy” I look down in disgust but my disgust quickly turns to pity. It’s Tayleigh Pendleton, the cute girl I had a crush on during that old show called “Fishtank”. She looks rough, covered in meth scabs and track marks. But those beautiful eyes are still there, and to further confirm my suspicion, Nebby is there with her, now old with cloudy eyes and patchy fur. My heart sinks, I knew she was going down a dark path, but I never expected it would get this bad.
I reach down and pull her to her feet. A look of surprise that only Jim Halpert could do washes over her face. “Cat, I’m here to save you” I declare. “But first we need to negotiate. I’ll give you two packets of zyn, a watermlon monster, and a bump of meth for anal”. “I would have done it just for the monster, she replies” as she leads me behind the building. After years, I finally get to experience that sweet sweet Pendlepussy. Life is good.
