Quoted By:
I will give you five fascinating facts about me.
1) I don't know how to play the guitar, but use my left foot whenever I try, which is very frequent.
2) I'm cucumber intolerant. They give me the runs and random erections in public.
3) Street lights turn off when I approach them, because they're afraid of me. I should carry a camera and record this for proof, but I can't be bothered.
4) I got expelled from school for getting straight A's after my parents gave me the idea to dress as Hitler at school by telling me one morning that I should never do it.
5) I can't ride a bike. This is because the seat gives me saddle sores so I have to remove it and sit on the shaft, which I can only endure for a few minutes.
Now, who am I?
