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Your beliefs are central to who you are as a person. They influence how you conduct yourself and how you treat others. They are your core. The part I find troubling is:
>we attempt to talk about things like that it always ends up in a fight
Why aren't you guys (or her doing the gaslighting) maturely having adult conversations about your politics, beliefs, ideas? Dont each of you have friends or family with views in opposition to you own, yet still maintain those relationships? I see trouble down the road.