>>11975128don't kill yourself. I've been there too. I still drink but in more moderation. can you explain what in particular is driving you to drink? loss? society? depression (if so what is the rationale)? Also explain religious/spiritual beliefs if any. we need more information to give better advice anon. but I can 100% say don't kill yourself it's fixable even if you don't see a solution personally. the brain can really fuck with you and make you feel like there is no hope but in reality there are many other options.
