>>23609579My online career consists of being a social media influencer who receives products for free—sometimes paid, sometimes not. The brands I prefer to work with most are local businesses, because I know what it’s like to have a dream and to want traction.
I realize a lot of people in the FTL community dislike me because they feel I’ve taken their dream for granted, and for that, I am truly sorry. If I could do it all over again, I would. I made mistakes. Would I have done every single demeaning thing you guys wanted? Of course not. Would I have won because I was the most entertaining? Perhaps not. Do I think I’m better than anyone? No. Do I think what the guys do is cool? Totally. Do I wish I had a better understanding of what I was getting into? Yes. Whose fault is that? Mine. Do I want pity? No. The fans give me a hard time, that’s fine. Any public figure faces that no matter how big or small. I will say I am a bit disappointed in people who have worked for them (freeloaders, fish I haven’t met) and make it a point to pick on me when I have shown them nothing but kindness. Other people idolize them and quite frankly I don’t get it. People tell me that they’re idolized because they’re a joke so I guess I should be flattered I’m not as popular? lol. It’s whatever. It’s neither here nor there.
I can’t win everyone over, but I can certainly try to right my wrongs.
I have to be honest. I have to speak how I feel—it’s the only way I can keep this page. I need to start living in a way where I can be unapologetically me again. People may not care what I have to say, but I can’t be silenced by those who don’t even know me or bother to get to know the real me—the one at home who could be your next-door neighbor or someone you bump into at the local bookshop. I am a person.
With all that said, I appreciate everyone who’s here for the right reasons instead of constantly ridiculing me about the same old things over and over.