>>12382165I can't seem to accept that no matter how much I try.
I also believe I will end up in hell because I can't accept the life that he chose for me, and the place he put me in, and the fact that he uses me as an example for others. I hate him honestly and I feel the burn inside my sternum when I curse him out but I never asked for this, I don't want to rule over anyone, don't need any rewards,
I just wanted to live a normal life, but he had other plans, plans which I hate and I don't ever see myself coming to terms with them.
For the record, I saw the transformation for about 1 month before I reverted to my old ways. That's why I know I have only this plain of existance before ending up in Hell, and because of his will I am suffering here and will suffer there as well ( that part will be my fault because I don't want to follow him), But how can I follow someone who allowed me to suffer this much , just so his other kids can learn , I can't.
Thanks for your reply.
