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How do I stop hating myself for liking men? Everyone has always treated me like garbage for it. When kids in school merely suspected it they traumatized me. In adulthood, my parents view my interactions with male friends with suspicion, and coworkers who are lesbian give me looks of disgust despite doing nothing to antagonize them, not acting flamboyantly, not disclosing my sexuality.
I would not care if like randoms called me a fag or something, the problem is that people with real power to hurt me are not okay with it, historically and presently.
I also want nothing more than a baby but that is impossible, even if women liked me for the sake of conversation, vaginas are revolting and I have no desire to copulate with one; even IVF is out of the question (were I fertile) because who would want kids with someone 5'6", brown, and reclusive?
I just want to be normal.
