>>157851611. First, accept that you're a sinner. Accept you do not have it within your own power to save your soul, and you do not have it within your own power to walk the correct path. Give yourself to God, and lay your sins at the foot of the cross. You will feel like a fake LARPer, you will feel strong impostor syndrome, you will feel stupid and ridiculous. These feelings are Satan holding on to you. Accept from the outset that if you are to be saved, you WILL involve yourself in spiritual warfare, and there is no way around that. Accept that you feel ridiculous, and keep doing it anyway.
2. Find a pastor/priest. Find a few. I've been to numerous churches, and most of them are not going to give you what you need. Not because they're wrong, but because they're based in an older culture, and they're normies. There are lots of people on youtube you can watch. There are lots of churches you're able to watch remotely (especially since covid). Find someone calm and understanding, but who is also unflinching about right and wrong. Someone who tells you Jesus can forgive your sins, but not someone who says Jesus doesn't see your sins as sins. At this stage, it does no matter what denominations you listen to, because the FIRST STEP is and has to be Jesus, and all Christians agree on that.
3. Listen to Christian music, Christian testimonials, Christian podcasts. You can still consume whatever other media you used to, but add it in. You will change over time, but trying to go cold turkey usually leads to a crash and hard relapse. It's ok if none of it makes sense or if people are talking about things you've never heard of or don't understand. Just keep listening, and you'll hear patterns and become familiar with stories and concepts and archetypes. The most important thing at this stage isn't to "be a good person," because no humans are "good people." The important thing is to learn to love God, and to feel the Spirit of God.
