>>10326076No one has ever truly made me happy, sure there were moments, but a lot of it had to do with the house I was in, who else was there, the illusionary aesthetic of it all...Guilt began to take over, childhood trauma, the realization women dont want YOU, they want the successful idea of you, not the broken you, not the im going to have to struggle for this you...that's why their survival instinct leads them to older more established men, maturity, but also the illusionary aesthetic of success....This along with falling in love with every beautiful face you see, forgetting the ones your mind doesn't have room for, hoping they are truly loved by someone else, simply to relieve you of the guilt and reality of how shallow you really are....Wanting to drown in love for so long, with an endless moment of perfection, only to wake up in a world edging on Hell.
