I'm a blonde blue eyed 18 year old girl raised in a strict Christian family. I came to this board to find likeminded people and have been lurking it for years. Acquaintances have told me I am quite beautiful and attractive, and my dream was always to find a Conservative white man to have white children with.

Few days ago, I saw a strange video. During a BLM protest, white people were kissing the shoes of black men. My parents have always shielded me from violent imagery and all things that are even remotely sexual. My heart raced and I understood that this is what being turned on feels like. It felt so wrong! It was insane. But there I was. It was so unfair! Why were they doing this?!

Since seeing that video, it's all I can think about. I fantasize about a world where all white people worship and kiss the shoes of black men and women, and I am on the street kissing the shoes of a superior black man with his strong muscles and his king attitude, just like in the video. Even if I will feel such shame at first, maybe he will reward me by petting my head? It's driving me so crazy with lust, all of this.

I even made an Instagram and because I look pretty I amassed a following in the span of 2 days, I've been uploading stories in support of BLM secretly from my family, everyday.

I don't even want a white guy anymore, my fantasy has become reality and I legit hope that this is what happens. I ACTUALLY want whites to lose the race war, the thought makes me so wet. I don't care about being a good Christian girl anymore, I just want to kiss a black man's shoes.