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Holy fuck, just kill yourself already. You repulsive little shit. You make this thread every Goddamn day expecting pity points, which would be fine if it was just once or twice. But everyday? Though very polite of them, these people are only doing you a disservice by putting up with your crap.
You can't expect to get better by moping around, getting head pats, on an anonymous BBS. So, grow the fuck up, and get a job. Or better yet just kill yourself, because we both know you're incapable of that. Since, if you were, you would prove me wrong by doing so.