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I'm sure you fags already know but here's the quick rundown
Now we really only have 2 major parties but inside the parties are divided as it were, there is very little unity
>Republican Party ("conservative) Cares about the economy, security and family values. Tries to preserve the constitutional rights. In reality most republicans are ideological whores and will repeatedly do shit not in American interests or actively strip away the rights of Americans. (George Bush Patriot act). Neo-Cons are examples of this, and the party is infested with them. Conservatives are usually better, but are fairly inept at winning shit. Trump is one of the first in a long time but he's not exactly what most would describe Conservative. Will Trump make america great again? Find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z!
>democratic party (Liberal)
Claim to care about the rights of minorities, blue collared workers, and environment. In reality they consistantly strip away rights and exist to expand social programs for the nogs and spics that infest the US. it has gone a far way from the days of FDR. Hardcore Liberals are even worse as they do all this, including country-self hatred, all with the air of smug superiority.
I could do the Libertarian and Green Party but honestly no one gives a shit