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ID:CQ9ou6s4 No.1259210 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
I know you guys like to have a go at us for losing the great emu war, but truly, emus are no joke.

The emus you see in your zoos have been pussified and domesticated. They are less than half the size of the real thing, and are bred for a more docile nature.

The true Australian emu on the other hand is a beast to be feared. They are unbelievably quick, and damn near impossible to hit. Not only that, they are tough. You'll need a bigger gun than an SLR if you want to get past the thick layer of fat and muscle protecting their vital organs.

Worst of all though, is the dreaded emu alpha. They are as hard as nails, thick as a brick, have muscles growing out their asshole, and are FIERCELY protective of the pack. It's not at all unlikely for an alpha to take a barrage of bullets from a 50 cal machine gun and proceed to rip the gunner's eyes out or crush his throat before passing out from blood loss.