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Quoted By: >>13311315 >>13311320 >>13311379 >>13312145
> Be me
> At groceries store
> In line at the register
> Suddenly I desperately need to fart
> But, really bad
> I know that if I can squeeze my asshole tight enough I can let the fart out so slowly it will be silent
> I try it
> I fail
> A loud fart noise erupts from my ass
> Everyone turns their heads and looks at me in disbelief
> I cannot even realize what I’ve just done. I’m so embarrassed right now I want to just die
> Try to play it cool and say “Haha it was a joke”
> No one is laughing but me
> I try to stay calm and go on with my business
> Everyone keeps staring at me
> They don’t stop
> I stand in line for 10 minute before it’s my turn
> Worst thing is that I need to fart again
> Everyone is still looking at me
> I decide that I will not be shy about it this time
> As I’m heading towards the exit with my shopping bags, I stop, drop my pants, squat, spread my bare buttcheeks with my hands and let out the loudest fart you’ll ever hear that has not been artificially enhanced
> A little bit of diarrhea comes out too. I literally shit on the floor
> Panic ensues
> Multiple ladies scream
> All the cashiers stand up as a defense mechanism
> The manager comes running from 100 feet away
> I pull up my pants, grab my bags and run away
> I will never come back to that store nor show my face in town ever again
> Currently looking to move out of the state
> At groceries store
> In line at the register
> Suddenly I desperately need to fart
> But, really bad
> I know that if I can squeeze my asshole tight enough I can let the fart out so slowly it will be silent
> I try it
> I fail
> A loud fart noise erupts from my ass
> Everyone turns their heads and looks at me in disbelief
> I cannot even realize what I’ve just done. I’m so embarrassed right now I want to just die
> Try to play it cool and say “Haha it was a joke”
> No one is laughing but me
> I try to stay calm and go on with my business
> Everyone keeps staring at me
> They don’t stop
> I stand in line for 10 minute before it’s my turn
> Worst thing is that I need to fart again
> Everyone is still looking at me
> I decide that I will not be shy about it this time
> As I’m heading towards the exit with my shopping bags, I stop, drop my pants, squat, spread my bare buttcheeks with my hands and let out the loudest fart you’ll ever hear that has not been artificially enhanced
> A little bit of diarrhea comes out too. I literally shit on the floor
> Panic ensues
> Multiple ladies scream
> All the cashiers stand up as a defense mechanism
> The manager comes running from 100 feet away
> I pull up my pants, grab my bags and run away
> I will never come back to that store nor show my face in town ever again
> Currently looking to move out of the state
