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how I fucked up my 5+ year relationship in one night

ID:GveK7F0X No.13446258 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
>be me
>know girl for 5+ years (since high school)
>slim, petite, green eyed qt
>perfect relationship in almost every sense until about 3 months ago
>she breaks up with me after she senses a lack of ambition in me after college
>this motivates me to get my shit together a little bit so I start doing steroids, test and tren
>she never actually leaves my side, still calls me every day and wants to hang out despite us being apart on paper
>however I become extremely horny on tren to the point where I'm messaging multiple girls a day as I'm working on this relationship with my ex
>one day we hang out and she makes me mad because she tells me to stop smoking in front of her but I'm on tren so I tell her to fuck off
>go home and get fucking hammered off half a handle of vodka
>mind and sexual taste is polluted by years of 4chan trap threads
>her younger sister's boyfriend is some twinky zoomer literally transitioning from male to female
>message this kid at 4am and tell him I want to fuck him
>of course she finds out and calls me a vile monster, evil, horrible human being, tells me never contact her again
>tldr; don't do tren
how in the wrong am I when technically we broke up 3 months ago? I think I'll probably anhero, fml bros