What counts as a good dad? I'm really conflicted. My mother had to leave my dad because the child welfare services basically threatened to take me away if my mother didn't leave my dad. I was never told exactly what was going on because my mother has died since. When i was around 10-15 i would start visiting him again on summer breaks, without really knowing anything about him, my mom never said anything bad about him. Typically when i got there he would put me to work, such as cleaning his house or carrying out the trash. If he considered me to nag about whatever even or fun he had mentioned earlier he would cancel it entirely. Sometimes he would make me go to my room at 6pm to discipline me on something. He would get mad over how i failed a sunny side egg. He would say bad things about my mother. I would sit still like a corpse in the couch because if i moved he would react negatively. I felt like i was walking on eggshells. He would make me go to the local store to buy tobacco for him where i had to convince the clerk to let me (i was under 15). He would take my laptop away to speak to his thai wife on my laptop, instead of interacting with me while i was visiting. I remember a christmas where everything was cancelled because my brother didn't like the movie or something and we would not eat or proceed until my dad got his way. I got yelled at for breaking a dinner plate (oh no his precious set...) Keep in mind these events happened over the course of a few years, maybe 80-100 days in total worth of visits there. He was never physically violent towards me, but he seemed to have the need to exercise some authority, always. Specifically punishments over banal things.